Saturday, October 23, 2010
Saturday, September 4, 2010
Sunday, August 8, 2010
Well, I’m sure you all are excited about this one. I’ve been nagged a lot by ya’ll about posting something about who I am and how I ended up where I am today. Well today is your lucky day! J It’s just a snapshot of me, and I know everyone wants the engagement story, but that has to wait a while. It will be long and I don’t know if I’m really comfortable posting it online yet. But in the meantime enjoy what you get! Hehehe!
Who I Am
I am a military brat. I will always be defined as one. J The military shaped my childhood. They sent my family to far off places and taught me to sleep anywhere anytime. They instilled a bit of the nomad into me. I moved 6 times before I was 15. That averages out to once every 3 years. To this day if I live somewhere longer than 3 years I get a little (ok, a lot) antsy.
My parents were both saved when I was very young. My dad was called to preach when I was pretty young as well. I still remember the first time he preached. I think we still have that goofy helmet! J Add preacher’s kid to my definition of me. I have been one so long I don’t think I really remember how not to be one! I might not always like it, but it defines me.
I was saved at the age of 6. A missionary came to our junior church and actually preached and gave an invitation. He talked all about what it was like being a missionary, and telling other people about Jesus. I decided then and there that I wanted to tell people about Jesus too. As he gave the invitation, I realized that I needed to be saved before I could tell other people how to get saved. I was so disappointed that I couldn’t raise my hand when the missionary asked how many kids were saved. I think it was the first time I realized that I wasn’t saved. I started crying. One of my teachers saw me crying and asked me if I needed to be saved. I said yes and she led me to the Lord. Add sinner saved by grace to that definition!
I got engaged at 18. He was the first and only boy I dated. I was engaged for 7 months. I struggled for a long time with God about what HIS will was in the relationship was. I know for a fact that it was His will to say yes to the proposal, but I knew after a time that it was not His will to get married. When I broke the engagement, it was not a pretty break-up. The break-up and some subsequent experiences with men in the next year left a bad taste in my mouth in regards to men. It took a while for the wounds to heal, but they have and now I am waiting for God to send me a husband. Add single to the definition of me.
At 19 I entered the workforce. After 4 and a half years on the career track in banking, I lost my job. I looked for a new job, but had no success. All the while I was once again struggling with God. I knew He wanted me to go to college, but I didn’t know how I was going to afford it, and anyways I wanted to take correspondence so I could work while I took classes. I finally gave in to God though and just started the process of applying to PCC. I was terrified about school. I have always been a good student, but I had never had a schoolroom experience. I was home schooled K-12. And I am older than several of the teachers. I didn’t know how that would work out. Fortunately though, God was just waiting for me to hand all of my concerns over to Him. He has been a HUGE comfort, my steady rock, the only one who I can depend on to always come thru. I have been living by faith for the last year. Every bill that comes, I don’t know where the money is going to come from, but God has always provided right on time. Finish the description of me with broke, old college student. J
So there you have me in a nutshell. A military brat, PK, sinner saved by grace, single, broke, old college student. J
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Sunday, July 11, 2010
by Russell Kelfer
Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried; "Wait? you say wait?" my indignant reply. "My future and all to which I relate "You promised, dear Lord, that if we believe, Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate, He seemed then to kneel, and His eyes met with mine . . . "I could give all you seek and pleased you would be. "You'd not learn to see through clouds of despair; "You'd never experience the fullness of love "The glow of my comfort late into the night, "You'd never know, should your pain quickly flee, "So, be silent, my child, and in time you will see
Quietly, patiently, lovingly, God replied.
I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate . . .
And the Master so gently said, "Wait."
"Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!
Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heard?
By faith I have asked, and I'm claiming your Word.
Hangs in the balance, and you tell me to wait?
I'm needing a 'yes', a go-ahead sign,
Or even a 'no' to which I can resign.
We need but to ask, and we shall receive.
And Lord I've been asking, and this is my cry:
I'm weary of asking! I need a reply."
As my Master replied again, "Wait."
So I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut,
And grumbled to God, "So, I'm waiting for what?"
and He tenderly said, "I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead and cause mountains to run.
You'd have what you want, but you wouldn't know Me.
You'd not know the depth of my love for each saint.
You'd not know the power that I give to the faint.
You'd not learn to trust just by knowing I'm there.
You'd not know the joy of resting in Me
When darkness and silence are all you can see.
When the peace of My spirit descends like a dove.
You would know that I give, and I save, for a start,
But you'd not know the depth of the beat of My heart.
The faith that I give when you walk without sight.
The depth that's beyond getting just what you ask
From an infinite God who makes what you have last.
What it means that My grace is sufficient for thee.
Yes, your dearest dreams overnight would come true,
But, oh, the loss, if you missed what I'm doing in you.
That the greatest of gifts is to truly know me.
And though oft My answers seem terribly late,
My most precious answer of all is still . . . Wait."
"Wait? you say wait?" my indignant reply.
"My future and all to which I relate
"You promised, dear Lord, that if we believe,
Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate,
He seemed then to kneel, and His eyes met with mine . . .
"I could give all you seek and pleased you would be.
"You'd not learn to see through clouds of despair;
"You'd never experience the fullness of love
"The glow of my comfort late into the night,
"You'd never know, should your pain quickly flee,
"So, be silent, my child, and in time you will see
Friday, July 9, 2010
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Friday, July 2, 2010
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
This is for you Pk’s out there.
Never underestimate the power of friends. They can share a load just by listening, they can raise your spirits with just a few words, and they can make everything go away even if just for a few hours.
I think as Pk’s we end up secluding ourselves unintentionally. Instead of sharing burdens, we look for other ways to deal with the stress. Some act out, some have breakdowns, some just don’t care, some take it to the extreme of leaving it all behind. I dealt by internalizing it all. It’s hard to have friends, especially in your Dad’s church. We know too much and you always feel like you have to be on guard, or a perfect shining example of the Christian life.
I lived about 4 years without anyone. Big mistake! I ended up feeling so secluded and trapped. I will never let that happen again. The difference this last year since I have had a friend nearby, and then moving back to where so many old friends live has been eye-opening to what I had become. By internalizing everything that had happened, I had become almost unfeeling. Feeling hurt too much. However, by closing myself off, I also missed the joy of sharing the good things with people. You know what they say, “life is better shared”. It’s true! Even the bad things get better and easier to deal with when someone else helps carry the load.
So, reach out. Find someone to share with. Renew old friendships, and then do everything in your power to maintain them. You never know when they might just save your sanity!
Can I also add a bit about finding other Pk’s to befriend? NO ONE will understand you better. (Other than God, of course) Friends and parents will try to, but unless they have been there, they won’t. Find one that’s been a Pk longer than you. They have walked in your shoes; they alone know the exact thing you need in a trial. And when you are on the listening end of the relationship, listen, and then don’t pass it on. Agree right up front that what you say stays between the two of you. It has always been the unwritten, unspoken agreement, but I fear people are forgetting that these days. Don’t judge right away, sometimes we just need to vent. Admit it! You’ve needed to before!
I recently got to spend time with another Pk. I came away so refreshed, so encouraged, and not feeling so alone anymore! Someone else had gone thru what I was going thru! I was not crazy!
Finally, pray for your friends! When they share a burden, pick it up and pray for them. Don’t expect them to pray for you when you aren’t returning the favor. Can I say especially, PRAY FOR YOUR PK FRIENDS! You know better than anyone what to pray for. Even if it’s just a stress-free day. Send a note or a small gift unexpectedly, you have no idea how much that can change a day, week, or month. Just to know someone cares, and is praying.
God, thank you for my friends. Thank you for their listening ears and for their prayers on my behalf. Thank you for the encouragement they bring every time I see or talk to them. Help me to remember to keep them in my prayers every day, and to do my part to be a good friend. I pray for my Pk friends especially that you will give them wisdom as they tackle this life you have laid out for them. Guard their mouths, and give them patience. Send someone to encourage them when I can’t. Thank you for the gift of friendships!
Monday, June 21, 2010
Sunday, June 20, 2010
"Contentment is not the fulfillment of what you want, but the realization of what you already have." Unknown Author
It is a daily struggle for me, but I have learned that it's a decision that I have to make daily. All I have to remember is that I am "complete in HIM!" Colossians 2:10
Saturday, June 19, 2010
Saturday, January 9, 2010
We are going to work backwards because I can't figure an easy way to reverse them.... :)
New Years Day my sis suprised me with a trip to Daytona!!!!!!!
Can you tell I'm excited???
Christmas Day with the Senn Family! (and Mickey....)
Yes, we were at Disney World for Christmas week, my birthday and New Years! This is a glimpse of the AWESOME fireworks display on Christmas day.
Christmas Dinner! Can you say Yummy????
Happy Birthday to me!!!!